By Steve Harvey
So something smelled about the astounding $2.15 billion purchase price of the Dodgers, not to mention the never-ending involvement of Frank McCourt? Well, the team is apparently trying to clear the air by offering a gift at your local 76 gas station_a Dodger car freshener. It supposedly emits the smell of newly "cut grass," though I thought I detected a faint whiff of gasoline, too. Anyway, I'm more excited about the newly cut parking prices (reduced from $15 to $10).
Thanks a lot
Can it get any tougher to find parking places around here? Stuart Melvin noticed a lot in the Larchmont area where even those "authorized" to park will be towed.---
L.A.: Land of Extremes
I think I read that line in the National Geographic once. Anyway, on the one hand, you can find what is touted as the nation's largest chair, a 40-foot-tall wooden perch, at the downtown L.A. Mart furniture center. It takes up six parking spaces.
Venice, on the other hand, is the home of a 1 1/2-square foot patch of lawn that bears the inscription "world's smallest front yard." A previous lawn there was ripped out by thieves, believe or not, so if you come upon a rival claimant for world's smallest front yard, be suspicious.
Well, Goodbye Dolly
I recently saw the funny stage production, "Notorious Broadway," which parodies famous musicals, including one that Carol Channing made famous. I was reminded of a photograph George Bentley of La Puente took near the Music Center. Bentley noticed that a prankster had added some words to a piece of graffiti, turning it into a commentary on "Hello Dolly Revivals"
Such a deal
Lewis Van Gelder submits the accompanying coupon for your "Bargain Hunting in Beverly Hills" file. The $1,000 discount is no joke; handbag purses run as high as $29,000 at Francesco Santoro, a store employee told me.
The "Saturday Night Live" TV show recently performed a skit about L.A.'s car culture in which an ailing Westside resident is advised to go to a treatment center in Marina del Rey. ``All the way the other side of the 10?" he exclaims. "It's almost Long Beach, man!"
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Dave Voda, an escapee from L.A. who lives in Boulder, Colo., emails to say that he was struck by the AHEDA STOP photo that appeared in this column. Voda suspects that it's an L.A. custom_and a confusing one_ to lay out the words in a pavement sign message "as if you are reading them one at a time as you approach. This presents a problem to me because the nuns taught us to read by taking in entire phrases at a clip."
And, of course, it further complicates things when the message appears to be partly in Italian.
A lifejacket-and-tie function
The Capitol Steps troupe, which specializes in political satire, played recently in Beckman Auditorium at Caltech. Spectators were advised beforehand that in the event of an emergency they should await exiting instructions from "your Italian cruise-ship captain."
Apparently some Long Beach residents don't get along with their furry neighbors. The newsletter of the Belmont Heights Community Association points out that the Internet offers recipes for such delicacies as "Grilled Squirrel," "Squirrel Alfredo," "Cajun Squirrel," and, of course, "Bushytail with Autumn Apples."
You've reached the end of the column. Contributor Phil Proctor asks that you to close the door on your way out.